… is now legal !
Good news (or is it?) unearthed this past week is that Muffin the Mule will be returning to television in September 2005 in animated form. “In 2003, Maverick Entertainment acquired the intellectual property rights to Muffin the Mule and is now focused on bringing him out of retirement. The company is investing two million pounds into Muffin’s TV makeover and has promised a faithful representation of the classic character.“
Diamond Geezer, a True Brit, and an Arsenal supporter unfortunately, is acerbic in his views about edible muffins.
The modern muffin bears no relation whatsoever to its traditional namesake. The modern muffin is more cake than bread, more sweet than savoury and far more 3-D than 2-D. It’s heavy where its predecessor used to be light, dense where it used to be fluffy and brash where it ought to be delicate. As you may have guessed, I’m not a fan.
‘American muffins’ are towers of sponge with an overflowing top like an atomic mushroom cloud, and equally toxic. It’s impossible to pick one up and eat it because every dimension is too broad compared to the widest stretch of human teeth. Muffins have to be picked apart with your fingers, which then become covered with sticky chocolate or blueberry stains. They lack real flavour, and any lingering aftertaste is probably wholly artificial. Muffins are also unfinishable, at least with a clear conscience, but millions of Britons still plough on to the last crumb all the same, risking pig-like obesity with every daily mouthful.
Right, that’s it then. Muffin else to say.
What? You expected me to comment on Charlton’s latest defeat?
Hell no. I’ll leave that to David Lacey who writes, “Almost inevitably it seems that when the clocks go forward the Addicks go back.“